Feeling down…..

Hi all, here I am.. blogging… my previous post was about wedding bells, such a happy post…. Now… its a totally different one…

There are so many things running in my mind now.. work colleagues and the top most… my future father-in-law.

Lets talk about my future father-in-law (:

He just left us….. all of a sudden… by a silent killer named: Heart attack. Im feeling super down coz I do not have a chance to call him Pa.. or rather during tea ceremony: “Pa, drink tea.” It will forever be something that I won’t have a chance to do.. As a Christian, We believe that once dead, there is no such thing as offering tea to tablet etc… So I say, I will never have a chance. Sitting here, just came back from last day of wake, and tomorrow will be cremation (he is a non-believer)… have thoughts running in my mind….

He is a good dad who raised 3 filial son together with mum.. who work all his life supporting the family (even told him that he could stop working and enjoy life, he refused). 

We planned to organize a trip to China (his fav. country) next year, but its all too late…

He was going to be grandpa next year march…..

I will definitely miss him, and wedding without him being around will be different too.. He will always be remembered…

Despite his departure, I believe God has a plan for all these to happen, for US not printing our invitation card up till now (less than 2 months to wedding), God planned it all. Thus, I believe God has a purpose…. This event also draw us closer to God, being baptised and born again, we should walk closer with Him, reading His words…

From this event, I’ve seen who are my friends and who are just superficial… I thank those who came down and extend their condolences to us. Although he is not my dad, Im really affected.Those who know me, knows how I really feel.. I thank those who texted me, sincerely asking how I felt, they couldn’t came because they just got married. On that day when things happen, i receive texts from some who do not feel like coming down and gave a lot of excuses, my thoughts were.. if you feel oblige, do not come. 

Really appreciate some of your texts and appearance, it really does make a difference. 

Well, sad things aside… Some things at work really makes me feel confuse… I have colleague who stab right in the back.. despite she knowing that we know she is backstabbing us… she can act as if nothing had happen.. I wonder how such person exist, how are they brought up. Seriously? your parents taught you how to backstab others? and then make yourself seem so poor thing? being so calculative at work even though you are just a junior? Even my newly join staff is still your senior btw, if you are talking about rank.. ha… typing all these just gave out a smirk on my face… Well, I guess you are just not well-taught. by whom, I have no idea. 

During church on Sunday, I learnt something, God is sovereign. Be sovereign and do not say things that will harm others. For that, I will always remember to watch my temper. 

I have another colleague who always speaks bad of others… create politics… make things seem so bad when its not that bad.. Tells you half of a story making you think that the whole thing is negative. 

I AM SO TIRED OF ALL THESE. TIRED OF GOSSIPS, TIRED HEARING SOMEONE BADMOUTHING ANOTHER. 

I’m leaving.. soon. I will continue to pray and let God decides where he wants to place me. Least I am some one who will leave since I said so, not a threat.

Guess I have thrown all my thoughts in this post. Once again, I really appreciate all those who came down and texted me asking me how I am.. Really really Thank you.

God Bless,

J.